Sunday, 30 November 2014

Blogging Blues

It's been over a week since I last posted and that suuuuuuuucks more than the human race on Black Friday. Soz had to get that little dig in there to all you lunatics that make me question humanity. But in all seriousness, I am soooooo rubbish at this blogging shindig of recent. I realised this week I have a real bad dose of bloggers/writers block *cries*. I am just feeling so uninspired. The past 2 weeks I have written 4 drafts of different blog posts and gave up half way through each one and left feeling so underwhelmed about posting them. Really it's nothing to worry about, it's happened before and I almost nearly quit once (Lolz let's not talk about that dark moment). Every blogger at some point faces this and it's just a waiting game for it to pass.



I find with blogging, the more you get involved or sucked into the bloggingsphere, the harder you find the pressure pushes down on you *Que Queen & Bowie singing Under Pressure*. As much as we say we don't, we consistently compare ourselves to the other bloggers who have better layouts, better content, better photos etc etc. It can put such a blow in your blogging mojo. We all have that one blogger that inspires us and is our favourite go-to blog that you just can't help sitting there wide eyed and envious of. Not to say that it's a bad thing, I find that the more I am inspired/envious of a blog the more it pushes me to work harder with my own. I have definitely noticed huge improvements in The Confessions Of A Professional Drama Queen over the past 12 months because of my drive to be just as good as the next blogger. So really, it isn't just doom and gloom with blog envy so don't beat yourselves up about it as I have seen many of you do! 

There are other woes to blogging that get to me though. This is one in particular I want to call out a lot but as so rightly stated by Joelle from Feb Girl and her amazing post on Blogsploitation, calling out on your issues with PR can make you feel as though you could be exiled for life never to be contacted by PR again. I have found recently a major player getting to me is bad outreach from PR or companies doing it solo. Recently one man in particular consistently sent me press releases in a tone of 'Here are the details and photos, post them on your blog'. I tend to completely ignore these impersonal emails which only made him send more and more. It got to the point where I emailed him and told him (politely I promise) that it wasn't relevant to me. He then proceeded to email me with arsey messages as though it was an outrage that I refused to post about HIS clients on MY blog. Outstanding sir, really you are. Another company also contacted me asking me to attend a venue. They booked me into a date and then never replied to confirm (well, until after to ask how I found it) or offered compensation for my efforts and willingness to collaborate. Needless to say I never went nor spoke to them again

I get so many useless emails a day now from insensitive and clueless PR assuming I'm an idiot and will post whatever crap they send my way. The best one I recently got was a '7 Signs You Need A Dating Coach'.....fantastic. Me and my boys Ben & Jerry are doing JUST fine by ourselves thank you very much. 



My other beef with blogging is the, and brace yourselves because my claws are coming out, the superiority that some bloggers hold. And I feel like blogging about this will bring me loads of abuse and judgement from bloggers. When I started blogging I completely underestimated how huge the blogging industry is. And with this, I was ignorant. I knew nothing and in a way and like they do say, ignorance is bliss. I just stumbled along posting whatever and whenever I felt like it. However the bigger this blog got, the more I worked with PR and the more I was sucked into the blogging 'community', I noticed blogging has felt more like a chore then a creative hobby. I am not saying I don't still love it it because honestly I still swear it was the best thing I ever did but now I feel there are all these rules and regulations I am restricted by. 

You see bloggers posting indirect tweets about certain bloggers doing certain things like immature high school girls, you see extremely influential bloggers imposing their views as though their way goes, you see bloggers attacking other bloggers for and referring to them as 'big' or 'small' bloggers and you just get plain rude bloggers who make no effort with those readers engaging with them. Sometimes I feel so outside of the blogging world and I am glad because like all sectors of life, people can be so mean. 

If you want to post your opinion whether it's a bad review on a most popular make up brand that everyone else loves then do it. If you want to add gifs and memes to your blog instead of feeling pressurized to have beautiful photos, do it. If you want to class yourself as a full time blogger even if you've only been blogging for a few months then do it. Ignore what everyone else is doing and go with what feels good to you. Ignore the 'Bloggers shouldn't do this' tweets and do what ever the hell you want. It's your blog and therefore it's your rules. I saw one girl give a bad review on Zoella's beauty range and the amount of abuse she got was horrendous. Everyone is entitled to an opinion and if you disagree with a product review then turn away. What's the worse that will happen, you'll suddenly develop an allergy to your keyboard for not responding with negativity?! 

Well I don't know about you but I actually feel a lot better getting all of that off my chest. Maybe this will help inspire me again. I would really love to hear your thoughts on all of this because it definitely makes me feel better when bloggers tell me they feel the same.


(Sorry I just had to get my favourite gif in here somewhere)

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Saturday, 22 November 2014

Autumn Antics Part 2

First of all, I am not even gonna mention my lack of presence in the blogging world. Second of all, this blog post is a complete U-Turn from my original Saturday post. I had this whole post written, it was pretty heavy. Okay not heavy but it was one of those ones where I share my thoughts on worldly issues and you all run away screaming at my lack of understanding and general no clue approach to life. 


I thought I'd do an Autumn Antics Part 2 post because it feels appropriate (You can read Autumn Antics Part 1 here). I have to warn you this post may make you want to vom on your laptop because it could possibly get soppy. I am in a bit of a soppy mood at the moment, soz. 

I have fallen completely in love with Autumn. I just never want it to end. I don't know what it is with autumn light but everything just looks that little bit more special wherever you're heading. Even my walk to the train station in the morning just feels a little bit more magical. The walk home not so much because it's pitch black so I have a constant feeling I am going to be murdered OR I fall off the pavement because I can't see where I am going in the dark. All I am saying is it's a bloody good job it's pitch black so no one can see me tripping around. But even in the dark and the rain and I am tuned away to my iPod, I am still grinning all the way. Someone just slap me out of this.

I've just had the most perfect morning that I wanted to blog about it. I'm one of those people now. The ones who blog about their daily lives instead of consistently trying to highlight to the internet that they're completely bonkers. Scary I know. 

So anyways, my bestie and myself took my new car out for a little ride to a local park that in my 22 years of living near to I had no idea existed - see, told you I was blind. It was such a beautiful walk around a huuuuge lake filled with ducks and Herons (Well, I think they were, but I know eff all about birds). Everything looked like it belonged on a Christmas card or a calender. Like seriously, Autumn just makes me want to instagram the crap out of everything take pictures of everything. 

 (Can we all just take a moment to appreciate the coat I am wearing by White Stuff as it was THE most expensive coat I have ever bought, which I shouldn't have as I bought it the day after I bought a new car. Someone just remove my bank card now)




That bird was definitely loving selfies more than I do. He was all 'ooo get my best side girl'.

Autumn/Winter walks are one of my favourite things to do. I love visiting parks etc and walking over miles of fields and forests. Everything, like I keep saying, is just so instagramable beautiful, it really is refreshing.

I swear at this moment in time I am walking around with a disneyesque view. Everything is so la-de-da and I can't stop grinning like an arse. I find I get my train home at night and my face hurts from smiling. It's just so nice to be feeling so happy. And I reaaaally dislike those people who tweet and write Facebook statuses about how happy they are all the time but sadly I am turning into one. Oops.

 
And of course, the perfect morning was completed with cake. This is me after all, when is there cake not involved? I also have to shout out to my bestie because it was at this moment she handed me my birthday present in a white envelope. I couldn't think of what it would be but to my surprise she is taking me to see Wicked next year! I really am spoiled! I couldn't ask for a better friend. We've known each other since we were 13 and we've been unstoppable ever since. Even up until today, every time we see each other we just chat none stop about what's going on in our lives and how we still laugh at the same old things. I can tell her some stupid thing I did or said this week and she'll totally get it and laugh with me....not at me people! 

And I'll end this post now before it really gets soppy. Don't you just hate how gooey I am being? I need to get a hold of myself as I don't know where this is coming from. This so unlike me. I'm pretty sure I am due a catastrophe somewhere soon as that is after all what the foundations of this blog is built on - my inability to function as a normal human being. 

If you have any autumn blog posts going please throw them my way so I can swoon with you. I'd also love to know what is your favourite part about Autumn? 

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Saturday, 15 November 2014

The Frustrated Ramblings of A Drama Queen Part 5 (I think?!)

It has been MONTHS since I did a ramble post. I know you loved reading them as much as I did writing them so in true Drama Queen style, here is the first ramble of my non student life. Try not to wee yourselves with the excitement! And seriously, what the hell would this blog be without some frustrated rambling. I am pretty sure the only reason I started blogging was so I could rant to the internet. That is a total lie, I am so kidding... not

Before you proceed I have to warn you this post if full of extra crazy (if such a thing is possible).
1. British Rail Travel
Just the title of this section kinda says it all. But if you live outside of Britain OR you're fortunate enough to NOT have to experience rail travel at rush hour, then I'll break it down for you. British rail travel SUCKS. The end. No but in all seriousness, I have been at my job 4 weeks so that's 20 mornings right? (my maths is crap, I am asking you in seriousness??....kidding....) Out of those 20 mornings only TWO, yes you read that right, TWO of my trains actually arrived on time. *Round of applause for Northern Rail/Network Rail*. You have NO idea (well you probably do if you rely on British rail travel in rush hour) how mortifying it is when your train is late/or cancelled on your first week at your new job. I am pretty sure the workers of British rail travel couldn't arrange a piss up at a brewery. 

2. People on British Rail Travel

This probably applies beyond British rail travel. Please someone tell me WHAT is with those people who stand within 5cm's away from you?! And not even when it's busy. When there's a whole mile of platform to share, they just come and get all bump and grind up in my space. I'm seriously considering investing in an inflatable ball to stand in at platforms. Remember folks, you heard it here first. 

3. Bad PR

This one is for my fellow bloggers. I am SICK of  PR mooses (it's my new insult okay) emailing me inviting me to events or telling me to post stupid links to their stupid press releases when it is NOTHING to do with my blog OR they assume I am doing it for free. OR they state 'It is something your readers would love to see'. That just makes me arsey. Don't say I don't protect you guys cause I really do. I also wrote about this for my company's site. If you too have experienced such arseness of the blogging world then be my guest and read and tell me what you think - http://www.pushon.co.uk/blog/our-bloggers-speak-outreach/

4. Gig Tickets

It a sad day to be a music lover in 2014. Remember the days when you could pay between £10-30 to watch an internationally known successful musician/band/singer?! (If you, don't you're far too young for the internet). I've noticed over the past few years the increasing rise in gig tickets. And I am not just talking £40-£60, I mean well over £100. It's no secret I am a Taylor Swift fan. Don't judge me, she totally got me through my late teens/any encounter I have ever had with the opposite sex. Me and my bestie have paid to see her twice, both at our local arena. We never paid more than £30. The minimum she was charging for this years tour is £60. C'mon Taytay, I love your music, but I don't love it THAT much. I can perform my own live 'boys are mean' concert for free to my dog in my bedroom thanks.

5. Aggressive Christmas Shoppers

So yeah today I was in Marks & Spencers and I forgot I wanted a drink when we'd reached the till. Now let me just paint you a picture here, it's around 5-6 weeks until Christmas? So naturally the world has gone mad  and people are shopping like they're preparing for an apocalypse. Most of the store is standing room only. So anyway, I quickly dashed through the store to the drink isle when this woman and her child were blocking the main isle. I am a polite person. In fact, to say that is an understatement. I am far too nice, I am consistently told this and that it will get me no where in life. So I am stood there being all awkward/British and nice and polite like 'Excuse me, do you mind if I squeeze past'. This goes on for a good minute and this woman is screaming at her child to listen to me and move. So it gets the point where I am like, screw this, and I just squeeze past them. This for some odd reason infuriates this woman even more to the point where she starts directing her anger at me instead of her child. I would love to tell you what she said but I just walked off as I am not going to be the blow of someones bad day. I am sorry people but there is no reason for Christmas shopping rage at all.

6. Britain's Crap Ability To Drive

Yeah you know who you are. If you are one of those crap people that doesn't indicate on roundabouts or can't even effing use a roundabout GET OFF MY BLOG. Every Friday I am in a mad rush home from work to get changed into my dance gear and head out for my dance class. Every Friday some arse either cuts me up on the same roundabout or doesn't even indicate and drives anyway. MORONS. I actually got so angry this week I tailgated someone in a white Nissan Juke for a good 5 minutes until I nearly missed my turn off. I swear one of these days I will actually tailgate someone home just to scream at them for cutting me up/not using their indicators. You have been warned you arses. I mean I am a bad driver but at least I am aware of it. When I honk my horn and swear until I turn blue these people genuinely look shocked at their inability to drive.
So my keyboard nearly exploded with that rant. I wanted to end this post with 2 none frustrated ramblings (Controversial I know) so here it goes:

1. I just bought my first ever car

He is a black Ford Fiesta with more gadgets then the Batmobile. I have always wanted a black car because I wanted to look like batman I want to look serious business so all those morons that cut me up on roundabouts get scared when I start tailgating them home. I've named him Beasty because he looks so fierce and his colour is classed as 'Panther Black'. Or his other nickname will be Cakemobile because I guarantee 90% of his trips will be used to head to cake suppliers to feed my cravings/obsession. I hope we'll be very happy together. And does that mean I have taken my first steps in being a full grown adult?! I mean I actually own 4 wheels. I am so an adult, right???? Right??!

2. Taylor Swifts New Album

Okay I know I just ranted about her gig tickets but I just can't get over her new album. I am a bit touch and go with some of the songs but I LOVE and I mean LOVE 'Blank Space'. My favourite lyrics have to be 'I can make the bad guys good for a weekend' and 'I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream'. They crack me up every time I hear it.  Plus the video is pretty much how every girl has ever felt. Also I recommend listening to 'Style'. The chorus makes me melt.

And from this post we have concluded that I am Wednesday Addams
.
Wow if you made it to the end of this post. I mean seriously, you were actually interested in reading this. I am surprised. Kudos to you. If you have any rants/rambles/general musings, please please please please get off my blog because I don't care. No no no I am totally kidding! I really want to hear them so I don't feel like the only mental woman on this planet.
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Sunday, 9 November 2014

Pre-Birthday Treats!

Are we all laughing at my 'I will be blogging twice a week' statement and how it didn't even last for a week? Fab. I wont even say sorry as it is probably going to continue like this from now until Christmas! November is always a busy month because of my birthday and seeing family and friends and now with a full time job it's even busier. I said this in my last post but I am just love love loving this time of year. Even though I am busy, I am busy in a great way! Unfortunately my blog is paying the consequences, sorry blog. 


I am writing this at the end of what has been a wonderful weekend. I started the birthday celebrations a few days early with my old housemates coming up to Manchester to stay. It was like the 5 month gap since we last saw each other hadn't existed and we were back in York, chatting away and thinking we were even more hilarious as ever. It was so sad to part ways again at the train station after an amazing weekend. 


I was definitely spoiled by them with their birthday presents. Yes okay I know my birthday isn't until the 12th but I could NOT wait that long to open them. My bad. 

Knowing my ever so well, they spoiled me with pretty gifts for my room, Benefit make up, OPI Coca Cola nail varnish, Cath Kidston treats, a beautiful Russian mug and a lovely photo of us. I am so excited to get stuck into the Benefit goodies, particularly the Pore Professional primer as I have heard non-stop good reviews! One of my hosuemates works for Benefit so I insisted she did my make up for the rest of the weekend. Gotta take advantage of the perks ey?

On our fun weekend we went shopping to Manchester and I seized the opportunity to blow my wages. Desperate for a pair of cleated heeled Chelsea boots, a trip to Office was a must. They had a 30% offer on Boots so it was a difficult decision/fate that I buy boots there and then. I had the poor shop assistant running back and forth trying to find me different boots in my size. I am pretty sure it was a huge relief for her once I had chosen a pair and left the store.



There was the awkward moment when my foot got stuck in a boot because of a dodgy zip and I couldn't get out and I had not one but two shop assistants trying to force the zip down/pull me out of the shoe. Seriously, wherever I go I am making a scene...



I also made a cheeky purchase of a Bobbi Brown Shimmer Brick Bronzer. I have been DESPERATE for one of these for months. I finally cracked and headed to Bobbi Brown in House Of Fraser. I asked the make up assistant if she could test the 'Beige' shade out on me before I made the purchase. At first it was all good, she applied the shimmer brick to my cheeks and I was looking all high and defined. THEN she asked what shade of blush I wear with my bronzer. I don't tend to wear blush with bronzer as I feel it makes me look too red cheeked/like a clown. So in response she whipped out the brightest shade of pink I had EVER seen as a blush, I am gonna go with Barbie pink as the only way of describing it, and applied it all over my cheeks. I looked like I had been slapped by a clown. I couldn't even show how embarrassed I was as the blush covered any form of expression on my face. I had to pretend to love it, purchase the shimmer brick and make a dash to a toilet to clean my cheeks. For the rest of the afternoon I was walking around Manchester with a permanent look of shame. Thank you very much miss make up assistant. 

That's the first and last time I use a make-up counter assistant to do my make up I am telling you. 

So yeah, cause you care so much about my existence, there is my pre-birthday weekend treat post. I am just going to be honest with you and say don't expect another blog post until next weekend as I have a mega busy week with it being my birthday on Wednesday the 12th of November (Had I mentioned that yet???). But I promise to come back with more exciting posts for you. I mean, not that it gets much more exciting then this ;) 

But if you seriously DO miss me, which I guess you probably do, you can keep up to date with my on Twitter and Instagram.

Byeeee for now....and for the next week....

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Saturday, 1 November 2014

Autumn Antics

First of all, what is this domain I find myself on? With the photos and the words, I think they used to call it a blog last time I was here but it's been that long I'm not sure. MY BAD. I am so sorry. It has been like what?! Borderline 2 weeks since I last posted?! I am a bad blogger of recent. I will wear the cone of shame *bows head*

No but in all seriousness I have valid reasons. I have just completed 2 full weeks at my new job and it was definitely a shock to the system. This week has been better but the first week I am surprised I didn't sleep through my train stop everyday. I couldn't even stay awake past half 8, it was really tragic. But moving on, thank you to everyone who has sent me lovely messages congratulating me on my new job. For those that have asked, it's fab, I love it and I am so happy right now! So far I have learnt 2 very big things, 1. British public transport redefines the meaning of crap and 2. Coffee is the most important beverage you will ever consume. Oh and obviously I've learnt lots of cool, fun stuff with my new job too.

This post is a 'Yay for autumn' and a kinda filler of what I have been up to recently because you all clearly care so much. You do don't you?  Admit it, my blog is your world. Firstly, I am just loving Autumn. It has to be the best time of the year. Everything looks so pretty, the air feels crisp and fresh and the fashion, oh lets not forget the fashion. Long leather boots, tan handbags, cosy jumpers and the blessed onesie. We're all good here.

Now unless you're living under a rock, we have just had Halloween (Anyone else freaking out because we're in November?!). Never having pumpkin carved before (Yeah I know I am an anomaly of society) my bestie decided to rectify this by talking me into pumpkin carving after work. I don't wanna brag or anything but....for a first ever attempt, I kick butt ;)




My bestie went for a Jack the Skeleton approach and me....well I just tried to do an accurate representation of what I look like in the morning...not a bad impression if I say so myself. 



Every year without fail I WILL leave Halloween until the very last minute. I tend to spend weeks debating what to be and being too tight to fork out on buying a proper outfit from eBay (or avoiding the fact that every female Halloween costume tends to look like it was designed for a porn star) in the last few days I panic and raid my wardrobe. This year was no exception however I did find my last minute ensemble was my best attempt to date. I went as some kinda creepy doll. Or another fab impression of what I look like after a night out, take your pick. 


I am excited for November as we have Bonfire Night, the most important day of the year: my birthday (12th of November, put it in your diaries folks) and of course lots of Christmas shopping to do. The build up to Christmas is just none stop fun and games. 

It is mad how insanely happy I am right now. It was a year ago this week that that things took a real bad turn. In fact, having a quick flick over my early November blog post, it was a sad one. I felt like I was carrying the weight of the world and life was never going to get back on track. I wish I could go back and tell myself that it would all be worth it and the bad times would need to happen to make me the stronger person that I am today (I am sure there is a 90s Britney Spears lyric I could squeeze in here). I ended one blog post with a quote:

'Hope, sometimes that's all you have when you have nothing else. And when you have it, you have everything'
 
True to this day I still stand by that. I still except things to go tits up, I can't possibly remain this happy for a long time because life doesn't work that way. But going through the past 12 months and when things aren't going your way, if you still remain hopeful, it will eventually get better.

And that's enough of the Disneyesque gooey almost-going-to-throw-up soppy stuff. I wish y'all a happy Autumn and to be excited for things to come, Including my blog. I have decided to implement a blogging schedule. The new aim is one blog post on the weekend and one blog post mid week. Who knows how long this plan will actually last for but it is worth a shot! 



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