Monday, 1 September 2014

Crap You Realise In Your Early 20s

I am typing this as fast as I can as we currently have builders doing an extension and they successfully drilled through our internet cable. They then stitched it together temporarily so who knows how long this is gonna hold out?! 

So since turning 21 and graduating the crap has kinda hit the fan. I am skinterooney (aka I have no/little funds) and I am *all together now* UNEMPLOYED! So yeah, could my life BE anymore fantastic? And could that sentence BE anymore Chandler Bing?! I kinda have this 50/50 approach to my situation. One half of me is extremely happy. I have all the time in the world to be rejected from full time employment applications and I am loving the way I can dedicate all my time to what I love - blogging! Plus I have been gaining some PR work experience so I am feeling pretty happy right now. Then the other side kicks in like a little screaming baby and is all 'EHMEHGERRRD YOU'RE UNEMPLOYED, HOW WILL YOU SURVIVE IN THIS CRUEL DARK WORLD?' and this side tends to kick in at 12am and 6am like clockwork EVERY night. I haven't slept properly in weeks. Luckily as I am here, there and everywhere at the moment I don't have time to feel tired. However the fear is real folks. Pity me. 

Enough about my sad sap of a life. Now, to the point. You realise in your early 20s this crap just got real and everyone is looking at you and expecting you to back flip through hoops to meet their expectations of ridiculousness. No? Just me? I have seen so many 'Now you're in your twenties it's time to go out, make mistakes and stop worrying' posts floating on the internet. That's great and all but for the average unemployed graduate fresh out of uni with low funds and a lack of social life tends to beg to differ. So, take off those rose coloured glasses and listen to the REAL side to life in your early twenties. Panic and shame galore. Oh and if you're wondering about that previous photo of me, well I think it sums up life right now.

1. What are your plans now?
53% of UK graduates least favorite question (the other 14% doing grad schemes, 23% doing postgrad study to prolong this mess and 10% doing ski seasons or 'traveling' on mummy and daddys trust fund, yeah I ain't bitter right?). How are we supposed to answer that question whilst avoiding the 'Well I'm floating between being unemployed and being a graduate OH and let's not forget all those Jezza K reruns I've been watching' response? Isn't graduating just fantastic?!
 
2. When will you be moving out?
Erm...I just graduated....I am unemployed....I am knee deep in debt....so I shall be moving into my swanky city flat anytime soon then. Seriously, do I look like I fart £50 notes?! I'll be living with my parents until I am 30 so just accept that and move on with your lives! 

3. When do you want to have kids?
Okay, what the hell is this whole *now I have turned 20 I NEED to get married ASAP and sprout a whole football team of kids* attitude everyone develops at/after uni?? I don't even know what I am doing tomorrow let alone thinking about when I will be using my uterus as a motel. Chill. your. beans. There is no rush. You're young, you have at least another 50 years of your life to get your crap together. Worry about that kinda deep talk when you're a lot and I emphasis a lot older.

4. You need to get out and meet a man
Or so your parents keep reminding you. 'We just want you to be happy' erm.......at what point did I ever specify I was unhappy because I ain't dating a bit'o eye candy? Moving on.

5. Can I set you up on a blind date?
Or so your friends keep joking. No. No. Just no. Well once again we can assume that now I'm in my 20's, my love life is everyone's business and needs to be controlled by all family and friends. Clearly. 

6. When did I get so OLD?
So you walk into the shops, you admire that pretty skirt in the distance, you walk on over and hold it against you and your first thought it 'EESH my bad for thinking this was a skirt and not a belt?!' And then it hits you. You got old. High street trends are no longer your oyster, you actually have to dress your age. In fact, you are borderline at the age where people can call you 'mutton dressed as lamb', scary right?

7. You got sophisticated
You find yourself craving Friday nights in quirky gin bars that serve cocktails in all forms or your mornings talking ambition in Starbucks surrounded by a professional atmosphere (with Leonardo DiCaprio on your arm as a major bonus). Cheap student nights in sticky clubs are so yesteryear.
 
8. All by yourself
You stand alone. Yes you have your friends, your family etc but really, you're alone in this gig. No one, no matter how much help or advice they give you, is going to get your future. It's all on you. So suit up, be brave and take it in your stride. Oh and if you're anything like me....stop telling prospective employers you're crazy....

9. High school never ends
That is a saying I hate because I hated high school and I know it's kinda true. Every high school has its cliques and its issues and so does life. Those people and problems you battled with in high school will reappear in new roles throughout your life. Hopefully as you get older you just learn to deal with it better. Just be prepared, you think you're the crazy one? Just wait until you meet the rest of the world...

10. Nobody has any clue what they're doing
No one. Not even your parents. You get to your twenties and you realise everyone is just milking it as they go. So ride that cow into the unknown and hope that it don't turn into a horse burger (Yeah I don't event know either).

And from this post we can conclude I need to go and live on an island by myself and hope someone throws money at me for no reason....just kidding. Basically, I guess the point I am trying to make (I think there's a point to this somewhere) is to stay calm, something might/kinda has to happen. Life will keep rolling whether you stand still or not. So I guess as a young unemployed/graduate in your twenties you have to stop worrying, stop trying to grow up so fast, get used to those stupid questions and try to ignore them and don't panic. I mean...if billions of people have survived their twenties before, surely it can't be THAT bad and we can do it to right?....right????


p.s. My aim with this post and with my previous life as a graduate posts is to stop the panic that is oh so common among us young'uns. So PLEASE share on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/With that friend you know is in this boat if you too can relate. I want to unite us unemployed graduates and bring reassurance and hugs and  messages of 'it's really okay that you turned into Bridget Jones' :) 
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25 comments

  1. I had fun reading this because I also wrote something about the things i wish i knew when i was younger. So ironic that when we were little we can't wait to grow up and once we became adults we have no idea what we're doing. :D

    I'm not sure if I've already shared this with you but i hope you don't mind:
    http://baredmysoul.blogspot.com/2014/07/day-22-21-things-i-wish-i-knew-when-i.html

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    1. Definitely ironic! Thank you for reading and I will definitely check your post out xxx

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  2. This was such a hilarious post - you've cheered up my Monday night! Oh and I 100% read that line in Chandler's voice before you called yourself out on being a major Friends fan! ;)

    http://aglassofice.blogspot.co.uk/

    x

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    1. Haha glad I could cheer you up :) Thanks for reading!

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  3. Oh hun u have made me feel old!! U are not mutton dressed as lamb at 21 trust me :) great post and reminds me of leaving college and realising I didnt want to study anymore but didnt know what to do. Its hard!!

    Good luck xxx

    www.nickikinickie.co.uk

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    1. Thank you and thank you for reading! xo

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  4. Haha I love this so much! I am turning 21 soon and will be graduating next year so I can feel you with a lot of these things. I hope you manage to find a job soon though :) xx

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    1. Good luck on your final year and thank you :) xo

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  5. Is it bad that I was one of those annoying people who seemingly managed to get a job straight from university, moved into a rented flat of my own and seemingly sailed through? What's worse is that it just seemed to defer problems to my late 20s - how am I ever going to afford to buy a house? Why is everyone getting married? How am I supposed to look after my family from so far away? How am I going to balance a full-time job and part-time study with a relationship and my family and my friends and a life?!

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    1. Oh wow I am SO envious of your easy start! I think things will just fall into place....I hope...I keep telling myself that anyway...

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  6. This is fantastic! I watch Jezza reruns just to avoid going out and seeing people who might ask me question number 1...haha. My new favourite thing is to give a ridiculous answer every time someone asks what I'm doing/planning on doing now, last time I saw my dad I told him I was going to rear donkeys. x

    www.weekendtoast.co.uk

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    1. Hahah you my friend are my kind of person!!! I am SO telling people I am going to be the next winner of X Factor next time I get asked! Thanks for reading :)

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  7. Haha, that is so true and i haven't even hit twenty yet. Once you graduate high school it's like everyone needs to know exactly how you're going to live each day of the rest of your life.

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  8. Really sorry you're going through this! What sort of jobs are you applying for? Have you consulted your uni careers service again for application advice? And do you have any tips for me regarding what you might have done differently in final year etc?

    http://www.pennedbyjenny.co.uk/

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    1. I am looking into going into digital marketing. And my university careers service was horrendous so they never gave much help even when I was at uni! My tips are that until you reach your final year, make the most of the opportunities available! University is the time to learn what you are good at and what you enjoy so go mad. When yopu reach your third year, focus on your studies, don't take on too much and don't worry about job hunting. You need the grades to get the job! Good luck!

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  9. Well said! And very funny too! I turned 40 this year, yes alarming, although luckily I look a lot younger and my husband is only 28 (yay me!!), but if I could go back to my early 20s I wouldn't worry about a thing. You have years ahead of you to do that!
    http://www.sweetwordsprettypictures.com

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    1. Awh thank you Amber! And thanks for reading :)

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  10. Yup. Definitely my life in a nutshell right now. Only I moved out at 18 permanently, so instead of parents funds to keep me afloat I'm relying on my boyfriend. I think you might enjoy a book called "Don't Worry It Gets Worse" by Alida Nugent (I believe that is the author...) it was super funny and was basically a summary of this post and the whole oh no I'm now out of school how do I become an adult.

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    1. Oh thanks for the book recommendation, I will definitely check that out! Being an adult is kind of a pain in the ass! Thanks for reading :)

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  11. I've just graduated and can relate to every one of these posts! I'm completely clueless about what I want to do and I just flit in between panic that I have no money/job etc and 'it'll be fine' attitude ha! Really enjoyed reading this post! Worst bit about being unemployed is just sitting around being rejected but aslong as you can keep your self busy and try figure out what's best for you it really isn't so bad..I guess! xx

    Kay | What Kay Does

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    1. Yep I agree, keep yourself busy is such a must! If I don't I go out of my mind! Good luck on your job hunt!

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  12. Urghh this is so true, hate the what are you going to do now question as if we all have a life plan written out! Xx

    Lauraslittleloves

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    1. I know right! We should so respond with interrogating what everyone else plans do with in their retirement, just freak them out!

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  13. I like how you've kept the post light hearted. I've build up such anxiety about turning 20 this year - it's as if as soon as you hear 20, you're expected to know what you want to do with your life & have it all figured out! It's kind of scary because until you're 16, everything seems the same you attend school and you're set in the same routine. Then you come out of school, and all of a sudden you're expect to know what you want to do within the next 50 years of your life! It's like wow, and then from then on everything seems to zoom by so quick. You're in college; you're expected to learn to drive, go to uni, do an apprenticeship, get a job, or just do something. Get your finances together, then it progresses further onto having to be in a relationship, kids, marriage and you're unsure if you even want any of those things especially this early on in your life! You want to come out of education, and just find yourself! Experience things, have fun, keep learning and explore, but society wants you to live life by stages whereas you want to break the mould and just be free for a while, but constantly you get reminded of these questions, and all of a sudden you feel the added pile of stress! It's a shame as you should love life and not feel under so much pressure! Why do you have to be expected to move so quick? But yeah, so can totally relate and love the post :-) x

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