I am typing this as fast as I can as we currently have builders doing an extension and they successfully drilled through our internet cable. They then stitched it together temporarily so who knows how long this is gonna hold out?!
So since turning 21 and graduating the crap has kinda hit the fan. I am skinterooney (aka I have no/little funds) and I am *all together now* UNEMPLOYED! So yeah, could my life BE anymore fantastic? And could that sentence BE anymore Chandler Bing?! I kinda have this 50/50 approach to my situation. One half of me is extremely happy. I have all the time in the world to be rejected from full time employment applications and I am loving the way I can dedicate all my time to what I love - blogging! Plus I have been gaining some PR work experience so I am feeling pretty happy right now. Then the other side kicks in like a little screaming baby and is all 'EHMEHGERRRD YOU'RE UNEMPLOYED, HOW WILL YOU SURVIVE IN THIS CRUEL DARK WORLD?' and this side tends to kick in at 12am and 6am like clockwork EVERY night. I haven't slept properly in weeks. Luckily as I am here, there and everywhere at the moment I don't have time to feel tired. However the fear is real folks. Pity me.
Enough about my sad sap of a life. Now, to the point. You realise in your early 20s this crap just got real and everyone is looking at you and expecting you to back flip through hoops to meet their expectations of ridiculousness. No? Just me? I have seen so many 'Now you're in your twenties it's time to go out, make mistakes and stop worrying' posts floating on the internet. That's great and all but for the average unemployed graduate fresh out of uni with low funds and a lack of social life tends to beg to differ. So, take off those rose coloured glasses and listen to the REAL side to life in your early twenties. Panic and shame galore. Oh and if you're wondering about that previous photo of me, well I think it sums up life right now.
1. What are your plans now?
53% of UK graduates least favorite question (the other 14% doing grad schemes, 23% doing postgrad study to prolong this mess and 10% doing ski seasons or 'traveling' on mummy and daddys trust fund, yeah I ain't bitter right?). How are we supposed to answer that question whilst avoiding the 'Well I'm floating between being unemployed and being a graduate OH and let's not forget all those Jezza K reruns I've been watching' response? Isn't graduating just fantastic?!
2. When will you be moving out?
Erm...I just graduated....I am unemployed....I am knee deep in debt....so I shall be moving into my swanky city flat anytime soon then. Seriously, do I look like I fart £50 notes?! I'll be living with my parents until I am 30 so just accept that and move on with your lives!
3. When do you want to have kids?
Okay, what the hell is this whole *now I have turned 20 I NEED to get married ASAP and sprout a whole football team of kids* attitude everyone develops at/after uni?? I don't even know what I am doing tomorrow let alone thinking about when I will be using my uterus as a motel. Chill. your. beans. There is no rush. You're young, you have at least another 50 years of your life to get your crap together. Worry about that kinda deep talk when you're a lot and I emphasis a lot older.
4. You need to get out and meet a man
Or so your parents keep reminding you. 'We just want you to be happy' erm.......at what point did I ever specify I was unhappy because I ain't dating a bit'o eye candy? Moving on.
5. Can I set you up on a blind date?
Or so your friends keep joking. No. No. Just no. Well once again we can assume that now I'm in my 20's, my love life is everyone's business and needs to be controlled by all family and friends. Clearly.
6. When did I get so OLD?
So you walk into the shops, you admire that pretty skirt in the distance, you walk on over and hold it against you and your first thought it 'EESH my bad for thinking this was a skirt and not a belt?!' And then it hits you. You got old. High street trends are no longer your oyster, you actually have to dress your age. In fact, you are borderline at the age where people can call you 'mutton dressed as lamb', scary right?
7. You got sophisticated
You find yourself craving Friday nights in quirky gin bars that serve cocktails in all forms or your mornings talking ambition in Starbucks surrounded by a professional atmosphere (with Leonardo DiCaprio on your arm as a major bonus). Cheap student nights in sticky clubs are so yesteryear.
8. All by yourself
You stand alone. Yes you have your friends, your family etc but really, you're alone in this gig. No one, no matter how much help or advice they give you, is going to get your future. It's all on you. So suit up, be brave and take it in your stride. Oh and if you're anything like me....stop telling prospective employers you're crazy....
9. High school never ends
That is a saying I hate because I hated high school and I know it's kinda true. Every high school has its cliques and its issues and so does life. Those people and problems you battled with in high school will reappear in new roles throughout your life. Hopefully as you get older you just learn to deal with it better. Just be prepared, you think you're the crazy one? Just wait until you meet the rest of the world...
10. Nobody has any clue what they're doing
No one. Not even your parents. You get to your twenties and you realise everyone is just milking it as they go. So ride that cow into the unknown and hope that it don't turn into a horse burger (Yeah I don't event know either).
And from this post we can conclude I need to go and live on an island by myself and hope someone throws money at me for no reason....just kidding. Basically, I guess the point I am trying to make (I think there's a point to this somewhere) is to stay calm, something might/kinda has to happen. Life will keep rolling whether you stand still or not. So I guess as a young unemployed/graduate in your twenties you have to stop worrying, stop trying to grow up so fast, get used to those stupid questions and try to ignore them and don't panic. I mean...if billions of people have survived their twenties before, surely it can't be THAT bad and we can do it to right?....right????
p.s. My aim with this post and with my previous life as a graduate posts is to stop the panic that is oh so common among us young'uns. So PLEASE share on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/With that friend you know is in this boat if you too can relate. I want to unite us unemployed graduates and bring reassurance and hugs and messages of 'it's really okay that you turned into Bridget Jones' :)