Thursday, 4 July 2013

The Single Life Confession...

First of all, I'm typing from my Kindle fire so be warned of the dreaded autocorrect!

Now, I can tell what you're thinking, just another single girl rant about how much the opposite sex suck and so on. Well you're wrong. THIS post is about defending the single people of the world against the couple snobbery that we are oppressed by every single day.

Starting with Facebook. Now am I correct in saying mobile phones were invented before Facebook? Yes, yes I am. Therefore when you insist on writing sloppy PDA messages on your other halves Facebook wall, please be aware that all the single people of the world are wishing your internet connection would just die. I'm making that wild assumption that if you have Facebook then you own a mobile phone and therefore could you not save the world the endurance of your cyber PDA's by keeping it private?! Maybe, and this is just a suggestion, send a …oh what's it called…oh yes, a text? Steady yourselves there, take it slow. I know it's hard to physically do something without informing the rest of the social networking world. But as a single girl, I believe in you! You can do this!

Secondly, this one goes out to all the parents in the world. Never is it ever acceptable to make a comment or so much as make a passing comment about your child's single status. Barely a day goes by when my mum or dad can't help but make some comment about that fact that I'm not currently dating, in a steady relationship, engaged, married or expecting. I'm 20 for christs sake, I have my whole life ahead of me, I'm way too young to be committing myself so deeply. I may or may not still sleep with my childhood bear and a stuffed disney character, does that sound like an age of engagement?! So leave your kids alone, the more you pester them the more your crush their self esteem!

Lastly, your friend is single? So what. Leave him/her alone. They don't need you making patronising comments such as 'oh well when you start dating' or 'we'll take you out and find you someone soon'. You might as well be saying 'We'll stick you on eBay and get you going for a good bargain'. Seriously folks, let the single people live in peace.

If you're guilty of any of the above points, go and feel very bad about your actions. Did it ever  occur to you that maybe they like being in th  position they are right now?!

Oh, and please don't judge me on the teddy bear fact. I'm already kicking myself for my apparent no-boundary-exists-on-the-internet-for-laura honesty...

L.Bel xoxo


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